Everybody Knows This Ain't Heaven.

2010

2010-06-07T00:28:00.004+08:00

It's 6 months into 2010 and this is the first post of the year. I've not been giving this blog attention for so long. I guess I'm just too tired to pen my thoughts.

My last post spoke about some restructuring. I am already in a new team within the same department, with a new manager and new colleagues in a very fresh and young team. Nothing is stable, everything's a new process and things are ever-changing. It's challenging in various aspects but one thing that hasn't changed is being underpaid and overworked.

Anyhow, I got back from Hong Kong / Macau / Zhu Hai trip a week ago. It was supposed to be a Bangkok trip which I had postponed once and eventually decided to change destination due to the political situation there. Really upsetting because Jeryd and I had planned to tailor suits, vests and shirts for our wedding photoshoot in Taiwan in July. And my wardrobe really needs a change for work. But the trip to the Chinese lands was a great break away from work. Shopping wasn't that great but the food was incredible. On our last day in Macau we had 7 meals. Very enjoyable except the fact that our legs hurt everyday from all the walking.

Can't wait for our next trip which is less than a month away. Looking forward to the photoshoot which I've still not worked out or lost weight for.

Our block is now 15 stories. Our unit is going to be built soon and we can't wait for next year to come. =)

May the rest of 2010 be good.

Thoughts on 18/11

2009-11-18T20:11:00.003+08:00

I took 6 working days off and spent 3 of those and the last weekend in Langkawi. The rest of the 3 days are spent sleeping, reading, surfing wedding blogs (which I am addicted to speed-browsing the beautiful wedding photos of ang mohs). It is truly a good break away from work. I was contemplating to log in from home to clear my emails so I can have a smooth morning tomorrow, but decided against it. Why waste a day off looking at emails when I don't have to? Right. I am so dreading work right now.

Anyway, on Langkawi - It is a really boring place. Think Phuket, less the clubs/pubs and crowd at Patong beach, and you get laid-back Pantai Cenang. Jeryd and I probably walked along the happening stretch Pantai Cenang 4 times back and forth on different days, with all the shops selling exactly the same stuff. There was absolutely nothing to buy. Shopping sucked. Food was great though, and they come cheap. As boring as Langkawi was, we still managed to keep ourselves busy with cable car rides to hill peaks, walking up hundreds of steps to see a waterfall, a snorkeling trip to have the most curious fish we've ever seen bite us (like fish spa, except it was just 1 really territorial fish), visiting pasar malam and eating street food, taking an hour bike trip to Kuah town in an attempt to shop, getting massages & floral bath, lazing by the beach and pool, and just simply enjoying the company of 2.

Now that Langkawi is over, we will have Taiwan to look forward to in June. If budget allows, I'm really hoping that we can go somewhere before June. If budget allows, I really wish to have lasik surgery done, and then go climb Mt Kinabalu and do the via ferrata. Sadly, there's no spare $$ to think about all these right now. We're trying to save as much as we can to have the photoshoot, wedding and cosy home..

So I'm anxiously waiting for year end to come, or the restructuring announcements, and see where I can go from there. I feel deprived of what I deserved for the hard work I had put into my job in 2008. I was finally able to have a closure, but this deprivation is something that I can't foresee being made up to me. Work this year is crappy for me. I should be glad I have a job after I had the honour to travel to Pune to give my job away. I have my own expectations, and honestly I know that I should not have those expectations, but I can't help thinking..

Work's a bitch, but I take comfort that I'm doing well in the other aspects of my life.

Just 6 more weeks to 2010. I wonder what lies ahead.

When I grow old...

2009-10-28T08:00:00.003+08:00

I don't want to nag at my children and grand children to wake up every 10 minutes on weekends once the sun comes up, or nag at them to bring an umbrella out so they won't get wet on a sunny day, or to ask the whereabouts of every single family member every half an hour.

I don't want my grand kids to hate me.

I don't want to be a difficult mother/grandmother to take care of.

I don't want to ask to pick up the telephone when actually it's the phone in the TV that's ringing.

I don't want to be asked to shut up and just go lie down and sleep cuz I nag too fucking much.

I don't want to have a goldfish memory and keep asking to be bathed or whether I've had my meals.

The list can grow on and on.

When I grow old, I want to be sane and lucid enough to be loved. I want to leave this world with everyone having fond memories of me. I want to die before I become senile or suffer dementia. What's the point of living to a ripe old age when ripe is not what I want to be. Skip and bring me right to the rot part.

Namaste

2009-10-19T23:46:00.004+08:00

I went for my very first yoga class and it was quite alright. Trying to catch on the yoga lingo and names of the poses was a bit tough. Needed to concentrate on breathing while getting the right posture wasn't easy too. I think the teacher was great. 1 hour in class with lots of stretching and breathing and feeling the inner beautiful self (which I've yet to feel) triggered some emotions at the end of the class when the teacher said to breathe in deeply, and be thankful for the blessings we have, and to feel at peace with oneself. It was a good class. Definitely want to make full use of the one week pass to unlimited classes.

If you're interested, look for the Pure Yoga ad banner on Channel News Asia's website and register for a free one week pass. Plus point about Pure Yoga, the bath cubicles have rain-showerheads. Not that I have been to the other yoga centres to compare, but I think they really have a nice environment. Of course, membership doesn't come cheap.

I think my body is rejecting exercise of any sort. I felt nauseous after class, and puked in the car park. Last friday after gym, I felt nauseous but not bad enough to regurgitate.

What's wrong with my body? This is clearly a sign that I've stopped exercising for too long now.

Shall sleep this sick feeling off.

shittybank

2009-10-14T08:00:00.002+08:00

Shittybank pissed me off yesterday because they claimed they are unable to waive off annual fee of all mastercards this year because there's no such promo. WHAT PROMO?! I don't care if there's no promo. My annual fee was waived off last year. If it costs me $150 to have the card, I'd rather not have it. Then the customer service person whom I was talking to reminded me that it's not worth it to terminate my card because I have 2 installment payments on my mastercard. If I wish to transfer the payments to my other shittybank card, I will need to pay $200. So she tempted me with 3200 shittypoints if I pay my annual fee, or I could convert these points into Krisflyer miles. Still it not worth it. I have spent so much on my mastercard, it's absurd that the fee cannot be waived. Big deal, I'll just pay off the oustanding installments on my mastercard and terminate it then. But still she insists any change in the installment plans will incur me $100 per plan. Doesn't make any sense that I need to pay additional $200 to pay all the money I owe up-front when it's supposedly an interest-free installment right. So I insisted that I will not pay the extra money, and I want to pay everything I owe on this card, and terminate the freaking card cuz NO I WILL NOT PAY ANNUAL FEE CUZ NO ONE PAYS ANNUAL FEE. I think I was pretty rude at this point that she didn't bother being polite with me. I asked to speak to her manager and kept insisting I won't pay for anything. She put me on hold for about 10s and said management will approve my fee waiver.

Too bad I didn't have the chance to threaten to terminate the other card and my savings account to boycott shittybank for $150 annual fee which I'm damn sure no one pays for it. Maybe they will waive off my fee and give me 3200 shittypoints if I did that.

Remember. No one pays annual fee.

LOL

2009-09-05T22:52:00.003+08:00

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
weird that u're feeling slpy when this timing is suppose to be ur work hr hehe
nways its janet here.

mayn says:
yeah cos it was a long day ytd

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
ya... slp early lor

mayn says:
and i haven't had coffee today!
amazed.
haha
tho i did have
ribena
silkyz barley
yoghurt
hahahahah

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
hahhahahaa sinful

mayn says:
lol

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
we juz had lamb chops for dinner.. jeryd cooked =)
wasnt hungry until 9pm man

mayn says:
wah shiok
ahahha

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
of cos
the chef is so handsome and is such a great cook

mayn says:
hi jeryd.
lol

Jeryd, the RAM, Smileyface says:
hahhaha
a great way to show u the transition ya
haha

mayn says:
hahaha
so OBVIOUS

Step 3 - to be actioned

2009-08-18T00:11:00.003+08:00

Steps taken in chronological order (not exactly the right order):

1. Home

2. Diamond ring

3. Overseas pre-wedding photo shoot

More huge & big-$$ decisions to be made.. I'm enjoying the process =)

Love Story

2009-07-06T22:30:00.004+08:00

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said,
Marry me, Juliet - you'll never have to be alone.
I love you and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad - go pick out a white dress;
It's a love story - baby just say yes.

Car woes

2009-07-05T22:39:00.002+08:00

Gonna be spending a lot of $$ on Lancerlot. Car can't go faster than 40km/h and I was practically crawling in KPE last night. Driving it on the roads at 20km/h is simply road-hogging. Managed to make it home from Hougang without any cars honking at us. It is so bad that the car has no strength to go up the multi story car park.

Jeryd drove it to the workshop before cabbing to camp in Jurong. Hopefully after repairs the car will drive fine. And hopefully repairs can be done fast.

This is f-ing going to burn a big hole in our pockets. Damn auto gear boxes.

I'm on leave so I have time to blog

2009-06-16T16:57:00.002+08:00

I've been back from my 3 weeks Pune trip for 3 weeks now.. Work sucks as usual. The long hours are making me age faster than I should, grouchier than I already am. Really unhappy but I'm gritting my teeth and facing mini battles every day.

With time, I will be taking on a new role, while hanging around to hold the hands of the Pune team. Until they can walk on their own, manager will consider letting me concentrate 100% in the new role. I already know I won't be happy with the route I'm about to take but I'm taking it anyway.

This is the life of someone who's too scared to move out of the comfort zone into the unknown because she doesn't have a clear direction as to what she wants out of a career. Not that I consider my current job as a career. It's merely a job..

Anyway, Pune wasn't that much fun. But it surely was an eye-opener. I think all Indian drivers can be F1 drivers. The roads are messy and drivers/riders try to speed safely. Traffic is jammed up at almost every time of the day. On the (over) population, every where you turn, there's always someone within your line or sight. Poverty is everywhere.. I see young boys walking in the market under the blazing sun without shoes on trying to sell stuff to earn money. Kids with their mum filthy and unkempt walking along the streets begging for water to drink. My Indian colleague's husband told me not to give them money or water or all the poor will flock to us and you'll just give in cuz you can't bear to see them suffer. And then there's the well-off Indians.. The income gap is too apparent.

If you see the photos I uploaded on facebook, there's pretty much nothing to do around there since my colleagues don't really bring me around to see hill stations as they can't spend their full weekends with me. So I've only been to those "markets" and the only touristy place I visited was Agha Khan Palace which 3 out of the 4 Indians who brought me there didn't really like touring the place so we left in like 15 min or so.

I don't know what kind of curries I had, but I loved them all! No severe tummyaches as I tried to only eat hotel or restaurant food. But eating alone sucks. Every weekday dinner is lonely.. I've never eaten alone in my entire life but I didn't have a choice since I was there alone. Glad to be home. Don't think I can take an overseas work trip like that. Unless we're talking about western countries where I can roam about easily on my own.

Looking forward to the next visit to see how the flat is coming along. Jeryd showed me some photos on Punggol forum that a block is already being piled up. Our block will be the last to go up, which means our unit will be the last to be built... which makes it special cuz it'll be like the newest of new. Well, ok.. at least I like to think it's special. =)

Leaving again...

2009-04-22T00:00:00.003+08:00

Yes I realised that my last post was quite some time ago. Been busy..

I'm back from my great Australian trip for almost a month now. I also am engaged for almost a month now =)

It sucks to be back, especially being back in the office. I have never really realised the importance of GOOD managers until now. Feeling a lot of pressure at work.. But that's just work.

Anyway, I'm flying off to Pune, India in 2 weeks time. Will be there for 3 weeks from 3 may to 23 may for work. Training new hires there to take over my function. I'm supposed to have a new role come June/July/August in my department but things are still unclear to me. There's a light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm walking alone right now.

I've never travelled overseas alone before. This will be a test of my independence.

But I'm feeling homesick already. Or maybe more lovesick than homesick.

Can't give up yet.

Leaving on a jet(star) plane

2009-03-15T22:07:00.002+08:00

I'm flying off for a 9 day holiday tomorrow.. and of all times, I am starting to fall sick. I can feel it. The throat is hurting a little. The nose is acting up and giving me a headache. Sigh.

Thanks for playing mahjong with me again!! Appreciate you all helping me clock mj hours before my trip at the expense of sleep...

Also, just a reminder not to email my work mail cuz my inbox is reaching its capacity and i cannot afford to not receive work emails. So leave me out of all the forwarded emails until 2 weeks later.

-----

Met my JC classmates last night and it was so nice catching up. Thanks for organising, Felix & Cindy!

2 months worth of updates

2009-03-01T23:25:00.002+08:00

I know I've been neglecting this space, but I think I'm more guilty of neglecting my friends..

ANYWAY, it's into the 3rd month of 2009. Shall write some updates about what has been happening to me.

As you all know, I've migrated to another department within the firm, but still doing what I've been doing for 2 years now. In fact, Feb 28 marks the 2nd year of my time in the firm. The difference about my working life now is (1) I have a new manager who I dislike very much, (2) my working hours are now 9am to 6pm and this means (3) I am getting less than what I've been getting back when I was working 12pm to 9pm shift since I do not get shift allowance. I can now finally make it for weekday dinners/movies.

I've been really stressed out for the past 6-8 months with work really. My hair has been dropping quite a bit lately and I can feel the little bit of my hair thinning some more. Sigh.

Good news is, I will be taking a break from work and going on a holiday with Jeryd in 2 weeks time. We won't be around from 16 - 26 March cuz we'll be in Perth/Melbourne. I can't wait! We've been looking forward to this trip since last August! I can imagine how our lives will be a little dull after the trip with nothing exciting to look forward to in the short term.

April and May will be 2 tough months for me cuz my 2 other team-mates are taking turns to go on leave to prepare for their exams. So I think I'm going to be MIA more during the 2 months. This may be the last update until June.. By then, I may be bald too.

In other updates, I've finally picked up Mahjong from Veron, Mayn and Jeryd. Mahjong's fun! And it's quite addictive..

Time to wash off the hair mask. Bye.

25 Random thing about myself

2009-02-27T14:16:00.001+08:00

I spent more than 2 hours on this facebook note. Posting it here too.

1. I'm on leave today. That's why I have time to write 25 randoms about myself.

2. I started wearing glasses when I was 6 (Kindergarten 2). I remember the first pair of glasses was a pair of light green plastic-framed one cuz it's in all my younger days photos. Now I won't really go out without contact lens.

3. I'm considering lasik but I'm scared.

4. I never owned a Barbie doll and was never interested in playing with them. My dad bought me toy cars, guns, trucks and all boyish toys to play with when I was a little kid. My mum said he really wanted a boy. So the closest he could get was a tomboy. I attribute my tomboyish-ness to this.

5. I was the only child till I was 7. Then my dad's wish came true.

6. My favourite playmates back in my old flat in Chai Chee were my cousins who visited every weekend. They have the craziest ideas and together we did stupid things like climbing up to the roof top and walk between water tanks, and having policemen knocking on every single door in my old block asking adults whether they have kids who went up to the rooftop cuz some busybody on the opp block spotted us. My relatives and parents backed us up that we never left the house. They also brought me underground by climbing down a drain and we walked in the sewers with drain covers above us. It was pretty fun to see cars driving over our heads.

7. I like to travel but don't get to do that often due to time but mostly money constraints. USA 2006 is still fresh memory and I absolutely the 3 months I spent working and travelling in the states. I will never forget how nice it was to taste niagara falls, literally. ZQ will know what I mean.

8. I love my parents cuz they are always supportive.

9. I have very poor general knowledge, and I don't read the newspapers. My poor memory doesn't help in this aspect too.

10. I can keep secrets. You can trust me on that.

11. My friends and bf, says I'm 洁癖 (not sure if the chinese characters are correct). I'm anal when it comes to cleanliness of food especially. There's no 5 second rule for me. And I cannot stand things that aren't placed properly, or if a photograph isn't taken with a straight horizon (if it is meant to be straight).

12. I'm not a conversation-starter, and I have problems maintaining a conversation. Unless the other party has never-ending stuff to talk about. Having said that, I think it's perfectly fine to enjoy the silence sometimes.

13. My first pets were canaries. Blue, green, yellow.. I cannot remember how many I had cuz some of them flew away and my dad kept replacing them. He had their feathers cut off so they can be let loose in the house and not fly away. I had the canaries for a year I think, and my parents decided that they should stop replacing the canaries that flew away. My last, and my favourite blue canary was set free by my distant malaysian relative (a small boy then). I was so angry and upset that I cried and I never spoke to him ever again. I must have been in lower primary school then. As you can see, this is lasting memory.

14. I lack creativity in naming my pets. My hamsters (who have gone to heaven) were named HamHam, Blackie, Cotton. I have a maltese which my family affectionately calls GouGou. Can't imagine what my canaries will be named if I ever did name them.

15. Brocolli and cauliflower look like mini trees and dried up mini trees respectively. That's why I don't eat them

16. I'm listening to the Daily Dose on power 98 now cuz Charmaine's the deejay. Otherwise, I'd be listening to my playlist in iTunes.

17. My tear ducts are very sensitive. I get touched easily. I can sob like a baby watching a sad or touching movie. I think the korean doggie show (I can't rem the title) and Armageddon had me crying the most. Sometimes when I get very angry and frustrated, I cry. I suppose you can call me a crybaby but I don't cry in front of people, at least I try.

18. I have this heck-care attitude that is similar to what most guys have.

19. I cannot express my thoughts and feelings very well.

20. I hate math. I hate calculations. I cannot remember numbers for nuts. I'm bad with dates. It's not that I forget birthdays, I just cannot remember them in the first place... I try to remember the months as far as possible.. really!

21. Geography was my favourite subject. I enjoyed the lessons and mugging for it. Favourite topic would be tectonics, but I've forgotten most of the stuff now.

22. I'm not quite sure how I got through university. Hall was just too fun. I could stay up till the wee hours playing dai dee, watching drama serials, chatting, supper-ing.. I suppose that explains my low CAP score. 23. I met the love of my life at the turn of

23. He is my bliss. =)

24. I want to see the northern lights, a meteor shower, witness solar and lunar eclipses, watch a lot more sunsets and sunsets before my last breath.

25. I'm afraid of being old. I think I'll suffer from dementia and be senile. But at the same time, I can't wait to live my life cuz there's so much to look forward to tomorrow, the week after, the years to come.

Happy 2009

2008-12-31T09:53:00.002+08:00

I've been busy keeping up with changes at work.. working long hours and feeling drained every night as I walk out of the office. I suppose this is not going to stop and I just have to get used to it, or find ways to manage the work and work more efficiently.. but I'm not even surfing net anymore!! There's not even time to read horoscope on iGoogle..

Anyway, the news is, I'm moving to another department along with 2 other team mates as a particular function is being deployed to the department where it rightfully belongs. This leaves 2 persons remaining in the current team, which won't make it a team any more.. sadly. It's not a bad move. Honestly, I think it's a great move for me. Just that the notice came so late and everyone has only 1 month to prepare for the deployment. Definitely shocked and sad that the team is splitting up when my team lead worked so hard to make this team what it is today.

Come 2009 (which is just tomorrow), I'll no longer be working in operations but in risk management. Sounds good doesn't it? I hope it's good.

Since the phone lines are gonna be jammed tonight, I'm just going to wish everyone a happy new year ahead. Take care of yourselves and be healthy!

Happy birthday Mayn =)

For MY Guitar Hero ;)

2008-11-21T14:45:00.000+08:00

Car boot sale weekend!

2008-11-21T12:05:00.003+08:00

If you're free this weekend, please drop by! Jeryd and I rented a space to sell our 2nd-hand barang barang. It'll be fun to shop in the bazaar and maybe you'll find something in the boots of other cars! I hope it'll be sunny throughout.. See you there!

Assemblies suck

2008-11-20T14:16:00.003+08:00

My parents and sister are holidaying in Hong Kong at this very moment. Or maybe they're in Shen Zhen. Or Macau. Whatever it is, the 3 most important persons for this occasion are not available to collect my sister's PSLE results. Being the nice sister and responsible grown-up family member, I went to her primary school to pick it up. Well and of course I'm on leave so I'm free to run errands like this.

When I arrived at 12 sharp at the school hall, it was already packed with students sitting on the floor in the front part, and parents seated on chairs at the back and there were also parents hanging around the corridor outside of the hall. The press release said to collect at 12pm, but I'm sure everyone arrived at 11am or something. Seriously KS. Not knowing what to do since I cannot remember how it was like back in 1996 when I had to collect my results, I just went in the back of the hall and was directed to a seat.

It then occured to me that I don't miss school assemblies, and I was reminded how much assemblies suck. This particular teacher was standing in front of a laptop and projector and talking at the top of her lungs through the microphone, to the kids sitting in front of her, and to the parents of course. She was explaining how the forms and stuff look like, how to exercise the option to choose secondary schools, deadlines etc. I guess the OHP is now obsolete and loud hailer is out of fashion (I can remember Ms Goh from Hai Sing speaking through loud hailer in the school hall and I can't rem why she did that). Anyway, it was hot and sticky in the hall, but the atmosphere in there was like fans at a concert anticipating the appearance of their fav pop star. When the teacher flashed the overall results of the school, announcing top students and their aggregates, the crowd went crazy clapping their hands off and students were just making a din as usual. It was very interesting to watch and the whole process was quite amusing to me. I guess I'll be like one of those parents some time in the future. I was pretty excited, trying to spot my sister's name on the big screen but her name didn't appear cuz the high scores were quite out of the ordinary. The parents of those kids whose names and scores were flashed had their anticipation overtaken by joy I suppose. They stood up when their children's names were called. Must be one of their proudest moments ever.

During the speech thingy, I was pretty worried about getting a parking ticket cuz I only placed a 50cent coupon and it was already exceeding half an hour. Then I had a bigger problem, I realised I don't know what was my sister's class. So while the parents and children were having the time of their life in the hall clapping, I smsed my brother and asked if he knew my sister's class and all I got was a negative one-liner reply. Didn't have a choice so I made an overseas call and luckily the phone was turned on. The children were sent back to their respective classrooms and so I just followed along and managed to find my sister's classroom. Stood at the back of the classroom door peeking in and listening to what her form teacher had to say. Seems like everyone made it to secondary school and I was so damn happy when she said "the top student of this class is Alethea...". The class went wow and I heard someone muttered shit. Funny stuff. So I waited around and collected her result slip and report book and came home sweatily but happily. Oh, I didn't get a parking fine fortunately.

Over the weekend...

2008-11-17T12:42:00.003+08:00

... I turned 24 and we became a year old.

Had gatherings and catch-ups and birthday celebrations last week, had anniversary celebration and did something permanent over the weekend. Eventful week I've had, and now I'm left with one week to enjoy before going back to work.

Thank you all for the birthday greetings, for organising dinners, for the surprises, for the presents, and for the well-wishes. =)

Thank you for the bouquet, the "bliss", the lovely picnic and dinner, and for being my pillar of support.

1st day of November

2008-11-01T11:28:00.002+08:00

I am reminded that life is short. Celebrate your birthdays as you grow old as they signify some increase in wisdom and white hair and fats or whatever. Celebrate the fact you've lived another year be it had been reckless or fulfilling. Celebrate life.

Happy birthday Lena.

Bobo

2008-09-21T20:47:00.008+08:00

My dad brought home a stray puppy. She was named "Bobo" by my sister. The poor little thing couldn't even walk properly cuz she's so small and weak. Her stomach was bloated and huge in comparison to her puny body.

Was it mean of me to refuse to adopt Bobo? I went through my responsibilities and I cannot afford another dog. It's unfair when my siblings want a dog and not take care of it. I admit I have been neglecting Gougou cuz I'm out 90% of the time and even when I'm home, he'll be too tired to entertain me.

I considered the cost of bringing stray Bobo to the vet to treat her skin (she had some black spots on her body and according to the groomer, there are pus in them), the amount of dog food needed, the time needed to train the new puppy and to care for it to nurse it back to health, I really cannot do it. And my siblings as I know them too well, are not responsible enough. We're lucky gougou is already well-trained by his previous owner, and there's not much trouble taking care of him. Bobo will be a big headache. I don't want to say yes to my dad and end up being responsible for Bobo when I don't have the time & money to be.

This may make me seem cruel. But I just cannot do it. She was crying and yelping when my dad brought her away from us. He called me and asked me if I was serious about not keeping her. I couldn't stand the poor dog's cries but I kept telling myself that I will not be doing the right thing if I agree to keep her. I think I'm selfish but I have can come up with all the reasons that I'm not.

Bobo needs someone who can give her the care she deserves. I know Bobo has been adopted already. Hope she grows up well.

Overcoming laziness

2008-09-07T22:58:00.003+08:00

After ditching my running shoes for 9 months, I finally wore them again. With a weak will, and weaker lungs and legs, I went for a jog around my estate. Aimed to cover 3km which is ambitious considering the fact that I have not exercised for a long period of time. Managed to only cover 2.5km.. I just couldn't carry on..

Hopefully when I start jogging with Veron in 2 weeks time, I can run 4km without feeling like there are lead tied around my legs.

Time to shed the fats and hopefully some weight!

Bliss

2008-09-03T18:14:00.008+08:00

For what has been close to a year, I have learnt a lot about myself by simply being with him and learning things about him. Things I never thought I could do, events that I never thought I could get past, emotions I thought I will never feel, history that I never thought I could accept - I did, I got past, I felt and I accepted.

I don't know why but I just feel like blogging on this topic this after seeing Veron's comments on bliss. Cuz cynics may think that whatever I am feeling right now is just something short-term and that bliss will go away sooner or later. To be realistic, no one really knows whether this is happily ever after. But I know it takes a lot of effort and accepting each other's imperfections. Whatever it is, Veron, I hope you can feel this way for a long long time..

I've learnt that it takes a lot to feel bliss. It's not something that comes easily like receiving romantic gestures, hearing sweet words, or being lovey-dovey-mooshy-mushy - these are the feelings of being on a "honeymoon". Don't mistake that for bliss, because bliss is so much more.

I cannot begin to describe blissfulness but I know that to feel blissfully in love, it takes a lot of honesty, love, acceptance, giving more than receiving, sacrifices, patience, compromise, and a common destination. Bliss is a lasting feeling.

Being in this r/s has taught me a lot. I feel like I've matured and really, I have never once imagined myself like this. It's so crazy when I think about us sometimes especially when the surrealness creeps in. Honestly, I have never ever felt so alive.

Here I go again

2008-08-06T09:30:00.004+08:00

It's been 2 months since the clean-up project started. 2 more to go. I'm really looking forward to the day when I don't have to spend 12 hours in the office. It wouldn't be so draining if 12 hours were enough. Weekends these days get sacrificed.

Breaking point? Not yet.

Have I mentioned I'm still working at Changi?

Sigh.

---------

Jeryd brought me to Singfest 2008 on Sunday. It was a mixture of good and bad. Performances were great, the atmosphere was good, music was pretty damn fantastic. One Republic & Jason Mraz were soooooo gooood. And I thought Jamie Scott is quite cute. But the heat was crazy (it would be worse if it rained), the crowd was sporting and very immersed, but getting around to the food stations and toilets was a pain.

=) I wanna go for music fest in Ireland or UK next time. I wonder if they have them in Autumn. It would be so much more comfortable without all the perspiration and humidity.

Meeting expectations

2008-08-05T10:14:00.003+08:00

I want to put down that mask, so you can see from my face how I really feel inside.

Then again, I think I'll look real bad.

The First Time by Surface

2008-07-23T01:12:00.000+08:00

You know I won't forget
The time we shared together holding hands
And walking in the park
Sometimes we'll have to do it all again
We were so happy then
I have no regret

Can you tell from the look on my face that
I love you more today

The first time I look into your eyes I cried
Do you remember the first time
We fell in love
You look into my eyes wiped the tears away
The first time
When we fell in love

Although sometime has passed
I still remember just like it was yesterday
The time is moving fast
The love I have for you
Time won't ever change I'll always feel the same
Now until the end

Memories we've shared will live forever
Deep inside my heart I know I'll never fall again

Gougou meets Fron

2008-07-16T00:27:00.002+08:00

Can't get a decent photo of Fron & Gougou cuz Fron couldn't stop going for Gougou's ass.

The outing has proven that Fron is desperate and gay, while Gougou is totally straight.

so damn tired

2008-07-11T01:19:00.002+08:00

I am so tired right now. I think I can sleep for 12 hours straight.

I miss those days where I can just sleep to wake up to just sleep again. Precious days like those are hard to come by again.

Need a break. Need to sleep. Need to feel fresh again.

Heading to KL in a few weeks' time for a short break. Jeryd & I need to get away from school/work.

AND WOOHOOO JERYD IS BRINGING ME TO SINGFEST!

Good night.

Changi

2008-07-02T00:18:00.002+08:00

I thought Changi is only going to be a week-long thing. Turns out I'm still working there. Why am I still there? Cuz the re-stack in ORQ is delayed. Why is it delayed? I don't know. Does this come as a surprise? Absolutely not. When will the re-stack happen? No one knows.

Argh. Frustrating.

And we'll linger on.. time cannot erase a feeling this strong

2008-06-16T00:54:00.007+08:00

Visited Lena last weekend. Updated her on my life. Hope she can see us all from the heavens and that she's doing fine there. =)

Been working at CS's office in Changi for the past week. Will be there for another week at least. Due to the lack of seats for the 5 contractors I'm in charge of cuz I'm overseeing this backlog project, I have to be separated from my team and be with the 5 newbies. Being in Changi is not a terrible thing. The lack of decent food is. Can't wait for the re-stack in ORQ so I can move back and bring the 5 together to be with my teammates so as to relieve some burden. I'm experiencing a whole new level of work stress. Training and taking care of 5 all by myself is not a joke. But I'm handling it the best I can.

Been working an average of 11 hours a day for the past week, I really wanted to make full use of my weekend.

Went to Wala's for the first time after work on Friday. EIC performed and they were good. The nerdy-looking guitarist had my attention cuz of his cute behaviour and his pimply face. Not to mention there were the gays and this super weird girl who were pretty entertaining and possessed respectively.

Watched Jeryd play soccer on saturday morning and bumped into Bernard Feng (Bernie, from blk E, rem?). Watched Singapore vs Saudi Arabia in the evening. My first visit to the national stadium, and it may very well be my last time too. It was funny, listening to the comments the spectators around us were making. It's kind of awkward, watching a match when I'm not a supporter of either teams, but being Singaporean, I wore red. It felt more right when I wore orange to watch Sheares matches. It was fun nonetheless, hearing people shout butoh.

The incredible hulk was so-so.

Sleep was awesome.

And my weekend is over. Till the next one...

David Cook's always be my baby has been in my head since friday night after I heard it on radio in the office just before I left for wala wala. Coincidentally, EIC performed it, and it just kept playing over and over again in my mind. Now it's on repeat on iTunes.

Some updates

2008-05-27T10:58:00.003+08:00

- back in the One Raffles Quay (affectionately called ORQ) office on the 24th floor, right beside the freaking window with the awesome view. but may not get the window for the next re-stack to move up to level 29. crap.

- the initial plan of going to Pune, India for a week is off. cuz the office there doesn't have a bloomberg terminal. so instead of training Indians, I'll be training local contractors right here in sunny island.

- not feeling too well for the past 2 weeks. need to build up the immune system. i think i need to exercise and eat better.

- gonna be late for work again. bye.

Weekends

2008-05-12T00:10:00.004+08:00

I've had 2 hectic consecutive weekends.

My dad & grandmother were hospitalised last weekend, for different reasons. I'm glad to say that they're both fine now. The fear of losing a loved one is terrible. I'm thankful for a complete family.

Sis's birthday and mothers' day fall on this weekend. Was busy shopping for presents, having family meals, and buying 3 cakes.. And a visit to army market cuz Jeryd had to get stuff sewed on his no 4s for his upcoming reservice =/

Like I said, the fear of losing a loved one is terrible. Please, treasure your family and friends. Please, treasure your own life so you won't cause your loved ones to fear. Please, don't go around trying to take people's lives, don't drive like assholes.

Next weekend will be a long one due to Vesak Day. Will be going to Desaru for a short getaway. Really need a relaxing weekend.

At least these 3 kids cheer me up.

So glad you were born

2008-04-16T11:05:00.003+08:00

on January fourth.

=)

Colbie Caillat showcase @ Movida

2008-03-26T10:44:00.004+08:00

So I went to Colbie Caillat's showcase last week with Mr J. Thanks again de!

Like he said, listening to her album sounds like listening to a very long song that last for an hour.

It was still fun. The "drummer", tamborine-r guy, is cute.

So here are 2 of the 3 videos I took. Her more popular singles that have been playing on air. Enjoy =)

Bubbly - Colbie Caillat

Realise - Colbie Caillat

Season of diamond rings

2008-03-24T22:53:00.004+08:00

You know there's a season for all things. The season of breaking up. The season of finding love. Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter. And then there's the season of engagement.

Yizi and Bernard got engaged not too long ago =)

My colleague finally got engaged to her boyfriend of 9 years. He got down on one knee, and she said yes. (Their facebook status - so cute!)

Weeli proposed to Rachel on her birthday =)

Meiyan got engaged too, which I just found out not too long ago from her blog. =) and her flat is almost ready!!

And so I heard of other happy engagements and proposals too, people whom I don't know directly. It's like a disease spreading or something. Got to say it's a harmless one though.

This is a sign of growing old. Getting to the age where the people around you are planning to settle down, balloting for flats, looking for re-sale apartments, checking out wedding and banquet packages yada yada yada.

Still find it amazing how one can decide to settle down with someone else. The prospect of living with someone for the rest of your life, building a family together, growing old together, facing whatever challenges that come your way together, IS actually quite scary. But the certainty that the 2 person feel for each other can be so calming at the same time.

So all the best to all you loving couples out there. May I be attending wedding dinners soon so I can buy onesies for all the kiddos who are waiting to pop out. =)

RIP, Blackie.

2008-03-15T08:50:00.003+08:00

Blackie, also affectionately known as Pepper, has joined Hamham, Delfi and Cotton in Hamster Heaven. He was a great hamster. Never once bitten me and was a good companian for Cotton. He was a shy one, always running away from my hands whenever I want to carry him out of the cage. RIP.

My tagboard is missing and I don't know why. I didn't touch my blog template at all so I reckon it'll come back soon enough.
It's finally the weekend. I realise I'm just counting down everyday for 9pm. Counting down for the weekend to arrive. Counting down... counting down...

Thanks to the boy ;) I'm going to Colbie Caillat's showcase next week, and We Will Rock You at the end of March.

The sun's out. It's time to go out and play.

Stereophonics

2008-03-01T15:27:00.003+08:00

Wish I could lie in the sun

The same things as anyone

Wish I could lie down there

With my feet, high in the air

I'd have a drink in my hand

Read words from a newspaper stand

Wish I could lie in the sun

Wish I could fly like everyone

Number change

2008-02-29T10:55:00.001+08:00

I've changed my hp number.

Ask me for my new number if you didn't receive my sms notification.

The Alchemist

2008-02-28T00:42:00.002+08:00

When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it. - King of Salem

Rainy weekend

2008-02-04T10:39:00.000+08:00

Weekends pass too quickly.

But at least I had an eventful one. Met up with 3 different groups of friends for KTV, steamboat (thanks Adi & Daniel for the logistics) & picnic over the weekend.

CNY's coming up. Have a good one everyone =)

=)

2008-01-30T10:42:00.001+08:00

a pair of movie tix to 27 dresses - $7

snapple - $2.80

mcnuggets & twister fries - $11.15

the joy of being surprised by a loving bf - priceless

-----------

On a totally different note, I really hate the Olympics series of Visa ads.
Master's ads are way better.

Friday woes

2008-01-19T18:45:00.001+08:00

I just had the worst day at work this year. Was so frustrated with some requests that came in through the team mailbox. The problem with a big firm is no one really understands what the other people do. All they care is getting their own job done (no doubt that it's your responsibility) but sometimes maybe working your brains a little will cause others less pain & anger. This was only the first half of the day.

Just when I thought that I can leave the office at 10:20, my phone rang and no name appeared and it didn't hint that it was an overseas call at all because the number begain with 6. So I picked it up. "Hi Janet, you're still in the office? That's great! We were so worried you were gone". I was like, who are "we"? Then I realise I was on a conference call with 4 other people from New York. 2 of them were nice enough to acknowledge that it was late in Singapore and I won't be able to do much for them, but they still needed me and so I stayed back. Left the office 12:30am.

Fridays have always sucked for me. But yesterday night takes the cake. I planned to stay later at work last night cuz my colleague had to take a call and I thought I'd stay to mentally support her. But who would have expected that I would get a call that would make me stay an additional 2 hours.

Really shitty. I'm glad I didn't have friday night plans last night, otherwise whoever's meeting me will have to take a rain check, or wait till the flowers wilt.

But at the end of the day, I had someone to cheer me up with selegie tau huey. =) In fact, at the end of every day, I always have someone there to make my night. Rain or shine, you're always there. =] Thank you dear.

Cuz this is real, and this is good. It warms the insides just like it should.

Hello, I'm alive.

2008-01-14T23:23:00.000+08:00

Just in case you think that Janet has gone MIA, I'm still well and alive. Even though this blog seems to have been neglected. MSN too.

Been busy. ;)

But life's good. Batam trip to celebrate Jeryd's birthday. Bonus coming to turn my financial situation the positive way up - hope for a big fat one, but quite unlikely. Got a lunch treat at The Line and buffet steamboat the next day to keep my stomach happy and fat. CNY coming i.e. lots of ba kwa to eat. Life's good.

Work's fine. I'm still counting my blessings (after almost a year) to have lovely colleagues.

View from the office. It has been rainy for the past weeks. There was one evening where there were low lying clouds. So gloomy, but cool.

Ok, this is a super incoherent post. I know.

Big soft toy doesn't need to wear a helmet

2008-01-06T23:48:00.000+08:00

WFNP

2007-12-28T10:19:00.000+08:00

10 pieces of clothings in 3 days. Sales are burning a big hole in my pocket, and my future pocket.

It's about time to think about new year resolutions. I'll probably just have 1 this year and stick to it. Maybe.

Presents!

2007-12-22T12:42:00.000+08:00

Look at Gougou's sianz face. He stood under the tree the entire night guarding the few presents. Nah he didn't la. The number of presents grew! =) And the tree has a golden star now.
19 gifts. And counting?

I've never really liked christmas, maybe just the christmas spirit. But the whole christmas tree bet changed everything. Thanks dear, for bringing the christmas spirit to my entire family. =)

Fashion Bar / Hot Stone

2007-12-22T12:13:00.000+08:00

He brought me to Fashion Bar at the Grand Cannery last weekend. I have to mention that the free drinks were pretty lethal. =P Anyway, they had a jubilee thingy going on at the Grand Cannery. So there were 2 games stall where you get to play for free! He won me a brown teddy bear with his marksmanship =) Best part of the night had to be the dinner. Hot Stone. The buffalo wings were good! The steak was HEAVENLY. Best steak I've ever had. Really. They served the beef raw on a hot stone grill, and you flip and grill it and omg I can almost smell the smell of the beef now. Don't think I'll be interested to eat at Outback anymore.
=)

We are

2007-12-15T02:15:00.000+08:00

A month older =)

Impossible is nothing

2007-12-08T02:16:00.000+08:00

It was impossible to sieve through thousands of thumbnail photos to get this. But Jeremy did. We still can't find the other one which we took outside the Esplanade. Impossible. And I do not have a finishing photo. Dammit.

Wonder if we'll do it again next year.

Singapore Marathon

2007-12-03T09:28:00.000+08:00

My colleagues. From left to right: Victor, Jinger, Winnie, Pris, Peiying, Yuling, me, Carol, Pamela, Jeremy. Photo is missing YY, who was probably nua-ing away in Labuan yesterday.

So yes, I survived 10km. The only times I stopped jogging was to hydrate myself. Quite proud of myself cuz I didn't really train up for this run.

Now my knees are aching =/

Our Christmas Tree

2007-12-03T01:45:00.000+08:00

I won a christmas tree from a bet. =) So we went tree shopping on Saturday, visited 2 Ikeas in a day, walked from Suntec to marina Sq and back, and we finally got everything we needed for the tree. Now my living room is brightened up by the beautiful 1.8m, nicely decorated christmas tree courtesy of the bf.

Notice that there's no star/angel at the top of the tree? We still haven't found the perfect one to put it up. =) and er, no presents at the bottom of the tree. yet. =P

Gougou with decor on his tail.

You are my joy

2007-11-22T22:56:00.000+08:00

My living room is filled with the scent of blooming lilies =)

Bliss

2007-11-17T03:02:00.000+08:00

So there's someone I'd like to introduce...

Meet Jeryd. =)

And that's him jumping out of the merlion's mouth. Crazy right? I know.

Lust, Caution.

2007-11-13T10:31:00.000+08:00

If you really like Tony Leung, don't watch the show. Then again, you may be impressed with his acting.

Nothing much to say. His orgas look totally freaked me out.

3/5 coco crunches for storyline.

Btw, I think this is the 1st R21 movie I've watched on the big screen. Interesting.

So do people really have sex filming R21 sex scenes? Or maybe it's just very good cinematography?

Lars & the real girl

2007-11-06T23:30:00.000+08:00

Ryan Gosling was skinny in United States of Leland & the Notebook. He was more well-built in Fracture. And he surely is fat in Lars & the Real Girl. It's funny at parts, but I find it to be just an average movie. 3/5 coco crunches?

Below, the view from window near my desk. Pretty nice huh =) Not much compared to the previous sea-view I get, but it's still good. Anyway, tt's so much more interesting to walk in Citilink as compared to the underpass at Raffles Place. There's so much more to see. The crowd is different, there're stores to window-shop while walking to the office every morning. Not to mention there's always gigantic posters of CK underwear models to look at, and Daniel Wu with whatever watch he's endorsing. I'm loving ORL. Don't really have time to shop around the area during lunchtime yet, cuz we're all occupied with work to feel slack even at lunch.

I got a balloon today. It wasn't a special day or anything, which made the gesture even sweeter cuz it's so... out of the blue. =)

Thank you.

Phuket 2007

2007-11-03T12:09:00.000+08:00

Photos uploaded on fb. 4 Links below:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=65339&l=09654&id=897610301

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=65341&l=db912&id=897610301

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=65344&l=2c7af&id=897610301

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=65347&l=549df&id=897610301

Happy birthday

2007-11-01T19:17:00.000+08:00

=)

2007-10-29T00:11:00.000+08:00

Hunting and Gathering, starring Audrey Tautou, is a really heartwarming and slightly romantic movie. All her movies are romantic anyway. I'll give it 4.5 out of 5 coco crunches. Oh, and the lead looks like McDreamy.

It's 4512221x better than Superbad.

Had a good Sunday. Ate popcorn out of a transparent plastic bag. Felt the hot sun on my skin and cool wind on my face.

My break has just begun =)

I got a letter...

2007-10-27T19:53:00.000+08:00

I got a letter today.

"Our records show that you have outstanding library fines of $1.50 in your account when you were studying in NUS....................."

TMD. The book was Roman Roads, which I borrowed to write the assignment essay for the history module From the Wheels to the Web. I don't remember returning the book late but apparently I did. Gee.

Anyway, yesterday was the last day for my team in ORQ, the nice, tall, and very proud looking in CBD with the greatest sea view, and an absolutely side-angled view of the Singapore flyer. (is that what it's called, the ferris wheel?). So we took a 2 hour lunch and ventured out to China Square Central to look for good food, and ended up at Sushi Tei cuz we really needed the air con. I paid for the meal and passed the receipt to the intern and told him to help me split up the cost. And this was what he sent us in an excel sheet approximately 15 minutes after we got back to the office.

It cracked us all up cuz he added the logo and the whatever little icons. He's really a joy to have in the team. =) I believe my colleagues feel the same way. We like to bully him and joke with him with all the lies we make up about our personal lives. Like how Madam Lau has a ang moh boyfriend called Jackson Rocks and that she was a child actress in the past, that's why she hates some of the TCS actresses cuz it's actress rivalry.

So yea, we're finally moving. =)

Mid week

2007-10-24T22:44:00.000+08:00

It's official. There's movement out of the team. =( It's going to be a tough month ahead. With all the cross-training that has to happen b4 my deputy team leader leaves, and the hands-on schedule to do the apac work, with the team leader training the Labuan people, I can't even begin to imagine how busy we'll all be.

The break next week better be good.

Anyway, I'm hooked to this song.

It starts in my toes

Makes me crinkle my nose

Where ever it goes

I always know

That you make me smile

Please stay for a while now

Just take your time where ever you go

Hair cut!

2007-10-22T21:56:00.000+08:00

Time passed so slowly today. Kept wondering how my darling boy will look like with his new hair cut. And this is what greeted me when I got home!

Now, he does look like a polar bear in the last photo! SOO CUTE. My bro is complaining gougou looks damn ugly now. He looks so different, it's like we got a new dog. Haha.

His bulging belly is pretty obvious since all the fur's gone. And he's feeling quite grumpy too. At least he looks so much cleaner and whiter now =)

Rain

2007-10-22T09:40:00.000+08:00

You know how I don't like the rain, cuz it makes everything so gloomy and all the colours so dull. I realise gougou doesn't fancy the rain either, especially when it comes with lightning and thunder.

There was a storm last night. I was dreaming I was going up the escalator and I felt someone tapped me on my back. I woke up and realise the gougou was beside me. Haha. It happened the other night when it rained too. He just wanted to snuggle you know, being scared of the thunder and all.

So adorable right.

Except that gougou's breath stinks. And it was impossible to hug him to sleep cuz he was facing me and I couldn't make him turn the other way. Time to get those dog biscuits that make bad breath go away.

---------

Over the 5 days of absolute nua-ing, I managed to shrink my stomach-capacity with a smaller appetite as proven by the little amount of sushi I've eaten at Sakae. Thanks Ling'er, for the really nice keychain! I've got my own star at the Hollywood walk of fame =)

Actually, I've accomplished nothing. Didn't put the jogging plan into action. =/ Ok, I shall do something about that this week, if I don't get home too late from work.

Photos of Yizi & Bernard's engagement to be uploaded once I get them from Cindy and Twinsies.

Sigh. Break's over. Fun's over. It's time for battle with the 2 computer screens.

Can't wait for next week. And pay day. Lol.

Kenny =) vs Arts laksa

2007-10-18T00:19:00.000+08:00

kenny. says (12:15 AM):
wah lau
i really laosai lor
3 times can

נαиєт - arts laksa r0x. need to eat red tea jelly. says (12:15 AM):
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
WTF LA U

kenny. says (12:15 AM):
even now my stomach still like not so gd
wtf lor

נαиєт - arts laksa r0x. need to eat red tea jelly. says (12:15 AM):
hahahhahahah
stop making me laffff

נαиєт - arts laksa r0x. need to eat red tea jelly. says (12:16 AM):
detox!

kenny. says (12:16 AM):
i just ate mcspicy meal
lol
bth la
laksa sucks
im not eating eat ever again

נαиєт - arts laksa r0x (HAHAHAHA. kenny u're so cute). need to eat red tea jelly. says (12:16 AM):
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
hHAHAHAHAHHAHA
i cant stop laffing
rofl

kenny. says (12:17 AM):
GO AND DIE
IM NOT CUTE
oh wait i am cute
but not in this way
stop hitting on me

Seriously

2007-10-17T23:34:00.000+08:00

DO NOT watch Superbad. As the name of the movie suggests, it IS bad.

It's supergay, and supersuck.

Words can wound, and wounds can heal.

2007-10-16T10:10:00.000+08:00

Strange Little Girls is by far, my favourite chapter in Fragile Things. I read it twice, the second time slowly, to get that every snippet is a different girl with a different life. The chapter ended by saying some of the girls, are boys. "The view changes from where you're standing."

Ok, I think I need to read the chapter for the third time. DAMN COOL.

Siew, remember to lend me For another day when we see each other k. And Serm, the Inheritance of Loss. Thanks =)

Welcome home, Linghan!

2007-10-15T10:58:00.000+08:00

I've had a good weekend and I don't know how to explain that.

Have a great week ahead everyone.

Happy birthday Linghan! & Welcome home... =)

狗狗

2007-10-14T14:20:00.000+08:00

Picture 1 was his first day at my place. And that's him with his fur growing longer as time passes. Till the last picture of him which I took today, with his messy fur. He looks as if he's grown, but I think it's just the fur that makes him look fatter. =)

Meet 狗狗. =)

Good night

2007-10-13T06:16:00.000+08:00

It's pretty quiet in here lately. I don't have much to say, as usual.

It's almost almost November again.

I miss all my friends whom I haven't seen in a long long time.

Bumped into jy and Ghim Chew at 85 earlier. Too bad dom wasn't around. I think it's nice to bump into people who're happy to see you. I'm happy to see you guys =)

Met up with ah Lye and Cynthia for supper earlier. The eastie gang feels so small in a group of 3. Sorry about mounting the curb. I mount curbs sometimes and I'm not proud of it. But thanks for always having the faith in my driving.

So once in a while dom and I will chat on msn. And this is the guy who never fails to make me laugh when we meet. But somehow on msn he becomes his serious self. He says things that are so true, and makes you want to sit down and reflect and think. But don't think so much if it doesn't make you any happier.

Good night world.

zzz

2007-09-24T21:15:00.000+08:00

Left the office early and got myself some drowsy flu & cough meds from the clinic. Shioks. Except that my queen-sized bed got downgraded to a single. =(

Phuket trip is confirmed. Going on 29 Oct and returning on 1 Nov. Don't mind more company cuz as of now, it's just me and another colleague. So let me know if you're interested! Accomodation hasn't been booked yet so yea, join if you feel like Phuketing. =)

Weekend rocks

2007-09-22T15:29:00.000+08:00

This week was pretty ok. Ups and downs are normal I suppose. Just have to take things easy and go slow.

Last night was spent with the hall peeps watching Ratatouille, hanging around the rooftop laughing my ass off and supper at fong seng. It almost felt as it I'm not a working adult, but a hostelite once again. It felt really good, cuz work was miles off my mind, and all I was thinking was hall, hall, hall. =)

Will be seeing more hall peeps and also some of the WAT gang later tonight for Law 4 and supper. I'm totally loving this weekend.

I'm so freaking broke this month cuz I attended a wedding. Pay's coming in but I'm paying 3 months of insurance premium once the money's in. Team leader and deputy team leader and the new intern's birthdays are also happening in October. And there's the Phuket trip that's most likely happening the end of October, which I'm really looking forward to, even though nothing's very confirmed as of now. It's a bitch having to worry about not having enough money to last me every month. Can't wait to fully repay my tuition fee loans. That would free me up some good money. Shit, didn't win Toto at the Mooncake draw last night.

Anyway, insurance. If you don't have a financial planner in mind, or no one you can really trust to count on, I'll glady recommend you mine. She's my JC classmate and she's doing this for the reasons I deem all financial planners should be motivated by. Yea girls, I've looked up Suyi and bought my life insurance from her, finally. I feel it's about time I starting protecting my life anyway, since I'm able to. Back to Suyi, it's such a pleasant surprise that she's the first in my JC class to get married. She showed me her wedding studio photos and it's just so sweet, that 2 persons can be so in love and to be so ready to spend the rest of their lives with each other.

Can't wait to attend an engagement dinner at Simei. =)

Life can really be beautiful with such blissful love.

Frustration - haven't felt like this in a while

2007-09-15T00:33:00.000+08:00

Feeling stoned. Attended for a 4 hour course on working cross culturally, it started at 9am. Just left the office not long ago at midnight. I officially hate Friday especially if it's a work day.

As of now, I hate everything about work. The neverending work. The accumulating work that can never be finished cuz there's never enough time. And after staying past a certain number of hours in the office and staring at 2 phucking computer screens for the entire day, really tire the shit out of me. My brain stops working but my hands keep moving the mouse and typing and going through the motion of getting work done but nothing is going on in the head.

I really wonder if it's me being unproductive and inefficient at work, thus making me incapable of coping with the workload, or is the workload too heavy. I'm still learning new things, and this means I've still got more work responsibilities coming my way.

I'm definitely not meeting expections given the amount of backlog I've managed to accumulate in the phucking mailbox and the amount of work still to be cleared.

I like my team, I really do. I just don't like the amount of work. Not right now anyway. Maybe I'm just really pissed and tired and frustrated. Maybe that's why I'm ranting.

Better week next week I hope.

Sway

2007-09-12T23:36:00.000+08:00

I felt the tremors in the office today. I thought I was hit by a sudden dizzy spell. So I sat very still, and then I realise I was swaying left and right.

Remember how irritatied I was when I missed the tremors twice in March? Finally got to feel some tremors for the first time. Don't really wish to feel them again cuz it just makes me dizzy.

Anyway, we hurried to evacuate the building, so that we can take the elevator before electricity shuts down or something. I can't imagine having to take the stairs again. My calves ached for a day after participating in a fire drill.

Hope there're no casualties and no tsunami.

(Overdue) Graduation fever with Acers

2007-09-02T14:23:00.001+08:00

Went back to campus a few weeks back to take photos with the place we called our second home throughout out university life. The photos are missing Linghan who's enjoying life in the States; Adi, who sent his dress back to Indonesia; Veron, who was busy that day; Keguang, who hasn't graduated; Lena, who's in our hearts always.

Acers 03/04
Level 5 short wing!
Our home
Nothing anyone can say, but SHUAI.

...

Funky

Rooftop with a giant banana. This is my banana, nananana. This is your banana, naaa nanananana. Chop your ur banana, nanananana. Now you have no banana, HA HA HA.

Monk(ie)s

Harry Potters

The sacred palm tree of block A. It seems to have grown very much taller as compared to the last time we've seen it in our backyard. Mayn commented it's due to the increasing number of dead hamsters that were buried there over the years.

Spot the person without an academic dress.

The end of the journey. Goodbye Sheares.

(Overdue) Graduation fever with the Girlies

2007-09-02T14:02:00.000+08:00

Mel's Convocation =)
One big happy family!Fulerton Hotel - SMU, NUS, NTU unite.
One Fullerton

Taken with Indonesian stranger guy's SLR.

Lots of tourists wanted to take photos with us that day, which was pretty embarassing. :$

What is this dreadful feeling

2007-08-26T21:16:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I've typed an entry, on my own computer. It's back, with a working motherboard & brand new ram. A million thanks (and french fries next time) to JM =) Won't have to quarrel with my bro over the use of his pc that much now, hopefully.

The weekend passed by so quickly. If only it could last a little longer. Yesterday was quite a beautiful Saturday if I don't think about the cloudy skies, the rain, the "bbq". Haha.

Ahhh, I just want to nuaaaa some more. Last week at work was hellish. Worked a record of 14 hours last Thursday. The entire team was clearing Batch 1 of a certain data review. Batches 2 & 3 to come when work starts tomorrow. It's interesting how much we have to work, how fast we try to work, just to meet deadlines and to prepare ourselves for more work that's coming our way. I was so relieved to leave the office last Friday. How do people keep their morale up, is a mystery to me.

In other updates, Cotton has passed on, joining Hamham, Delfi & Panda in Hamsters Heaven. She looked scary in death. My bro picked her up and he commented that her head felt as if it would drop off from her body anytime. There was blood on her neck and she looked so weak, so fragile, so lifeless. She seemed to have been bitten by something. It cannot be Blackie/Pepper cuz they don't fight. I don't suspect my dog cuz he doesn't disturb the hamsters. Sometimes, he'll stand and look into the cage but he doesn't go near them. I really don't have a clue to her death. May she rest in peace.

Have a great week everyone.

881

2007-08-22T00:04:00.000+08:00

If you don't like Jack Neo, I understand why. This isn't Neo. You have to watch 881 (although some may beg to differ). There are fresh faces on the big screen instead of the usual lao zha bor and child-stars and hui ge and mark lee.

Hokkien songs never sounded so nice. And the costumes are so ge-tai glam!!

4/5 coco crunches.

Ge tai anyone?

Mmm

2007-08-19T00:05:00.000+08:00

Just had dinner with Charmaine at Aston's Specialities. It's this western food place at Katong (directly opposite Katong Mall) with really affordable dishes. I had a prime rib steak with 2 sides for only $12, and Charmaine had a black pepper chicken chop with 2 sides for $5.90! Cheap and good. The downside is the queue to get in the restaurant/cafe. We stood in the line for exactly 55 minutes. And we had to wait for 15-20 for our food to be served. If you have the patience & the time to spare, you should go try the food there. Think the steak is really worth it for the price. I'll definitely go back there again but the dreadful queue can be quite a turn off. Opening hours are from 11.30am to 11pm, and they're closed on Mondays.

I signed up for the 10km Standchart marathon with my colleagues. Unbelievable right. The thought of jogging to train up makes my legs ache a little. Since the last 5km run (of which 1k was spent walking), I've not been running at all. Anyway, I need new trainers. So I'll probably start jogging when I get a pair of new running shoes. Probably.

Bah. I'm out of things to say. My life is so boring.

Monday blues

2007-08-07T01:19:00.000+08:00

It sucks to have to go back to work after a week's break from monitoring the inbox, linking issuers and accounts, generating management reports blah blah blah.

Monday blues will last through this entire week.

If only I know what I want and what makes me happy.

Empty

2007-08-06T02:47:00.000+08:00

Tried to write a letter in ink

Its been getting better I think

I got a piece of paper

But its empty

Its empty

Maybe we're trying

Trying too hard

Maybe we're torn apart

Maybe the timing is beating our hearts

We're empty

Back from BKK

2007-08-03T02:51:00.001+08:00

I'm back. 4 days weren't enough time to spend in Bangkok to have a proper holiday. I didn't even go for thai massage. Not enough time. Not enough money. I don't know what I spent on, or how I spent all the money. The wallet just kept getting thinner. I changed 400sgd worth of baht at first. Then another 100sgd. I even had to withdraw 300 baht from a UOB ATM (at Indra Square).

Just a disclaimer, I didn't buy enough souvenirs for everyone.... (due to the lack of time & depleting resources). Couldn't find a decent working bag for guys that was cheap (sorry, Gerald)

Anyway, the trip was good. We stayed at Indra Regent Hotel, which was in Pratunam area, just beside Indra Square, Pratunam market, Baiyoke garment centre, and is about 10 min walk from Platinum & Central World Plaza. Great location. It takes about 10 min to get to MBK & Siam Square, which is about 50 baht (about 2.30sgd) if the cab goes by the meter.

Shopping is generally good. Bags and shoes are like super cheap. The clothes are pretty alright at wholesale prices. It is a must to bargain cuz they really jack up the prices for tourists. I suck at bargaining really. Bangkok is like a shopping paradise for ladies. For guys, erm, it could possibly be a nightmare. There're stuff for guys like tshirts.. and massage.. and.. I don't know. Food? Booze?

The markets & shopping places are so huge with so many things to look at, I just wish I had more time and money. And better legs that don't ache from all the walking.

Anyway, thanks to Jean's Thai friend, Vitoon who picked us up at the airport and brought us around to taste the local food. Their kuey teow is really nice sia. Vitoon brought us to Suan Lua (the name of the place sounds like it's supposed to be spelled this way) and there were kopitiams and streetside hawkers. The food was really good, and cheap.

So that's it about Bangkok. Less than 20 photos were taken. I don't think there is even a group photo. Hah.

Recent Updates

2007-07-30T01:50:00.000+08:00

I got a 6-year old dog for a week now. He's not a pure breed so I have no idea what dog he is.

Mingshun has flown over to the states to be an intern for Google. Yicui & Shuyuan are going for exchange in Europe. You people please take care and have lots of fun. Yicui, have fun loving in Turkey. =)

I'll be away in Bangkok from 30th of July to 2nd of August. (No work for a week!! HURRAY)

I'm sick. Only my left nostril is clear for breathing.

It was great catching up with the girls.. By the way, are you girls free next saturday to go take photos in our gowns before Mel has to return her gown? We forgot to discuss about this at steamboat earlier.

Good night.

Almost

2007-07-22T02:08:00.000+08:00

The song that was played at Nickelodean's Space Surfer on loop every single day in the summer of 2006.

I almost forgot to say something else. And if I can't fit it in I'll keep it all to myself.

I almost wrote a song about you today. But I tore it all up and then I threw it away.

It's better to be optimistic

2007-07-16T02:46:00.000+08:00

The weekend ended so quickly even when I don't clock 24 hours of sleep in 2 days.

Had a good weekend cuz Mel graduated & the 7 of us finally managed to take a group photo with full strength. The last time we had all 7 present was probably during Cindy's birthday (was it 21st? Man, that's quite long ago). Or was it a CNY steamboat @ Mel's? Can't remember the sequence of events cuz out meetings are so sporadic & sparse. So that was a good day! Please send/upload the precious photos ok.

Alright. I should get some sleep. I'm prepared to face the battle at work this week and I'm determined to go home everyday feeling good about what I've done for the day. =)

Hello Goodbye

2007-07-14T14:06:00.000+08:00

You say yes, I say no.

You stay stop, I say go go go.

You say goodbye, I say hello.

Hello hello.

I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello.

Anyways, I don't get why the need of such an advertisement for a debut match. All the hype for what? I got to admit that he's hot (as long as he doesn't speak). Have you watched the Motorola phone advert? He said Hello Moto at the end of that ad and I flipped. But he's so sexy (as long as he doesn't speak).

And I really like this song. Sounds like a cover of the Beatles', or is just Paul McCartney?

Tired

2007-07-11T21:35:00.001+08:00

Work has been draining. Looking at 2 screens for 8 hours (at least) really strains the eyes. Looking at the team inbox kills my mind. I leave the office everyday thinking if I've done everything right. Sometimes I worry that when I get to the office the next day, some big-shot would have emailed me to tell me that I've made a mistake.

Guess I'm really not that comfortable with my job responsibilities yet. I don't get stressed out but there're signs that I'm bothered. I've been clenching my teeth more, my jaws are tensed, I get tensed, and I don't sleep well.

Everyone goes through a phase like this when they start on their new job right? Maybe I'm just taking a longer time to settle in, cuz there's always something new that I have to learn and act on. But it's so mentally tiring.

I'm not giving up yet of course. I'm just saying, you know. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one feeling this way, and I don't want to be the only one feeling like that. I want someone to understand exactly what I'm going through. I just want to feel better. I want to feel like I can cope.

I want my mind to be cut off from work after work. But I can't stop thinking. Worrying.

Fuck. I think I'm stressed. This is so unneccessary.

Graduation

2007-07-08T14:53:00.000+08:00

So it's the week of commencement for NUS graduates. Ceremony was boring but luckily I know the girl who was sitting next to me. I remember liking the valedictorian's speech though I can't remember much of it except that it's a day of thanksgiving because we have a bunch of people who helped us achieve what we have, or the like.

My dad bought me the Linus graduation lion cuz my mum told him I wanted it. Lol. And Veron said my dad loves me very much. He does. =) But of course love is not measured by the gifts he's given me, cuz that would mean that my mum loves me lesser than he loves me. Lol. Anyway, I'm a lucky child..

Congratulations to all you graduates of 2007.. It's the start to the end of our working lives.

I was 6 and my socks weren't level...

I still sort of have the same hair as when I was 6.

More photos on facebook.

When are we throwing mummy away?

2007-07-02T23:58:00.000+08:00

Graduation ceremony's this Thursday.

The only reason why this convocation means a lot to me is cuz my parents will be there to see me get the degree scroll. Cuz my dad has always asked me when are we going to throw my mum away (that was like in kindergarten and he asked me that question like everyday and now he's asking my sister that same question now) and my answer was always "when I get to university".

He still ask me that sometimes. Makes me wonder how my mum is able to tolerate this shit sometimes.

Anyway, if you're free this Thursday and feel like coming to take photos with me or whoever friends you have from bizad, the ceremony should end around 4.30pm at the University Cultural Centre. See you if I see you.

Phototaking on 7/8 July

2007-06-27T10:42:00.001+08:00

Hey dear hall peeps, let's go back to hall either on 7th or 8th of July (sat or sun) to take photos in our graduation gowns..

Please tag me on which day you prefer.. but hopefully we can all make it on the same day..

Right now:
Saturday: Mayn, Jerm, Jan, HH.
Sunday: Aaron, Jan, HH.

Photographer volunteer needed.. preferably someone who has a good cam.. bring it.

Tag me.

[Edit: I hear from Mayn that there's going to be a block bbq on 7th.. so we can all go back for that.. and urm, how about postponing the phototaking to 14/15 of july instead.. cuz Eunice not free.. lemme know what you guys think.. if you all have better suggestions.. feel free to say whatever..]

[Edit Edit: ok Mizwen won't be in sg till 18th july...]

seriously. there has to be a day when everyone's free. or maybe, make an effort to make some time for this. how about national day?

What makes you happy?

2007-06-22T00:46:00.000+08:00

Papa Lye is naggy

2007-06-08T03:46:00.000+08:00

Less than 2 months before my holiday to Bangkok, will like to ask you people to recommend hotels.

Conditions are simple:
1. Good location
2. Affordable
3. Clean rooms + bathrooms
4. Not haunted

Tag/MSN/SMS/Email me. Thanks!

Btw ah Lye, I still haven't called Tigerair to change my passport number =P

=/

2007-06-08T02:58:00.000+08:00

This isn't insomnia. I felt so sleepy at 10pm after watching polar bears in the artic on animal planet and went to sleep. Now I've woken up and I can't sleep. Screwed up shit.

Feeling kind of frustrated lately, due to work matters. It's like I'm finally getting comfortable with what I'm doing, and someone announces that I've got a new responsibility cuz someone else is leaving the department and the other team is short-handed. Not that this isn't good, and not that I'm complaining, but I've barely settled down and be good at whatever I'm doing. Perhaps I should really change my attitude and embrace responsibilities cuz these are chances for me to learn more things and meet new people and also opportunities to up my experience points (or whatever you call it).

In perspective, it's not that bad. So why can't I sleep.

I don't even know how being energetic feels like anymore.

Life should be fragrant.. Rooftop to the basement..

2007-06-04T23:15:00.000+08:00

It's summer, I can taste the salt of the sea. There's a kite blowing out of control on the breeze. I wonder what's gonna happen to you. You wonder what has happened to me...

For you a thousand times over.

2007-06-01T00:16:00.000+08:00

Going into the list of my favourite books ever:

It's being made into a movie and going to be shown in the States on 2 November 2007. Hope it'll be showing in Singapore. Not as if it matters. As long as there're torrent seeds.

If reading this book can make me tear, I think the movie will make me cry buckets.

The kite runner is the author's first novel. Apparently his second book, "A thousand splendid suns" is even better than his first book. Anyone who has a thousand splendid suns please lend it to me.

Pirates... Whatever.

2007-05-28T23:52:00.001+08:00

Those who're going to watch Pirates 3, stay till the credits finish rolling. Cuz there's a snippet of "10 years later".

Guys, we missed it.

It's embarrassing. I haven't dozed off in the cinema for a long long time, and I dozed off twice watching Pirates 3. And it wasn't even a night show. I remember dozing off watching Pirates 1.. Think I was watching in Jerm's room in when we were in Year 1.

Lots of funny parts in the show. I love Johnny Depp. He's so quirky and weird and he's damn good. I got to get my hands on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Anyway, I really didn't like Will Turner cuz he keeps switching sides. The focus seemed to be Bloom and Knightly instead on Depp, which I wish wasn't the case.

2/5 coco crunches.

By the way, I tried "whatever" today. It costs $1.30 from 7-11 and guess what I got. Chrysanthemum tea. Yucks. My colleague bought "anything" and she got the cola. Double yucks. Cuz it ain't Coca Cola.

Generation 5.5

2007-05-27T22:02:00.000+08:00

I've always wanted an iPod cuz the stupid 128mb Creative Muvo player isn't enough anymore. From the wanting of a Nano when it first came out, to wanting a U2 iPod, to wanting the red iPod Mini (for every red iPod purchased some money goes to support HIV victims) and today, I finally own a U2 iPod.

They should have the discography all loaded in the iPod. But they don't. Or at least, they should have some U2 videos. But they don't. I'm still happy anyway.

GSS just started. Looks like I won't have enough money to last me the entire month. Payday just came and I'm already needing the next payday to come.

Going to have to eat cheap food (lau pa sat = yucks) for lunch for the month. For now, at least I'm happy. =)

Waterspout

2007-05-26T01:01:00.000+08:00

It's times like this that I love working in a tall building with a great sea view. The waterspout that we thought was a hurricane was above a ship and it moved slowly inland. As it shifted inland, the waterspout loses it's strength and became shorter and urm.. became nothing but a piece of tiny cloud. WAY COOL.

I thought it looked like a dick that's peeing. Then at some point, it looked like the plant-watering thingy.

Wish I had my camera with me.

It's Over. She's free.

2007-05-24T01:54:00.000+08:00

Grey's Anatomy is so fucking good.

There're so many episodes that I love so much and the latest episode totally blows. It feels like a finale. It probably is. And not to mention the soundtracks are as good as the O.C.'s.

The drama in Grey's is never-ending. Every single episode is so damn dramatic (and I'm not even talking about the disgusting and gory surgeries) and emo and it just keeps getting better and better.

AAHHH... damn high now.

Batam

2007-05-22T21:18:00.000+08:00

4 of us went for a short weekend getaway at Batam. Yuxin couldn't go cuz she has to study for her upcoming CFA exams. We stayed at KTM Resort where Cindy's family friend is a regular customer and going with him made us feel like VIPs cuz we skipped the checking-in, had personal chauffeur to drive us around the city and picking us up whenever we wanted, get great seafood meals etc etc.

Here's us on the ferry to Batam. Cindy can sleep everywhere. We stayed in this "house". It has 2 bedrooms with air-conditioning, 2 bathrooms, a very spacious living room with dining area and slacking area, and also a mini-cooking area. Very comfortable for 4.
Our last meal. 8-course lunch for 6. The manager seems like a generous man. But then again, we were treated like VIP thanks to cindy's family friend, uncle Toh.

Mellie & the jacuzzi. We paid sgd38 each and enjoyed 20 min of jacuzzi, a foot scrub and an hour of full body massage. Really pampered ourselves that day. Went for hair wash for sgd4. Mani/Pedicure for sgd20. Cheap cheap! The spa villa has a seaview. We had our massage at night so it wasn't much of a view. But hearing the waves crashing while being massaged was nice. It was the first time I had a fully body massage and all I can say was that it was quite an - experience. Batam has Hello Panda dips!!! Like Yan Yan like that! And flavours that are not available in Singapore I think. Cookies & Cream Hello Panda, have you eaten that before?! Salmon Teriyaki Lays too! I didn't like that. Tasted like salmon.
Donuts from J.Co. KK is still better. This is probably comparable with the Donut Factory in Singapore. Though the chocolate isn't that good. Cuz I heard that Indo/Malaysia's manufactured chocolates lack a certain ingredient so it's not that tasty. The glazed donut smells like KK's original glaze. The dough is not as great. Certain flavours are pretty good. Cheap cheap. sgd9 for a dozen. This is the wrecked Sentosa. Looks so.. sad.

That's it for the Batam trip update. Did lots of catching up with the girls and it was just great hanging out together. =) Let's go it again sometime. Batam View next? Yuxin, your attendance will be compulsary then.

Hi

2007-05-15T22:26:00.000+08:00

Just dropping by to say hi and sorry for the lack of updates.

PC's under repair and I'm really tired from begging my brother to use for 15 min everyday to check my emails and facebook.

So I guess I'm not going to update for a while unless I really have things to blog about. Maybe after this weekend of relaxation.

Btw, I think Spiderman 3 is worth 2/5 coco crunches. If you disagree and think it's worth more than 2 coco crunches, you must be a guy.

Btw, I've finally realised that money is easy to spend, and really tough to earn.

My name is Ja-nerd.

2007-05-05T04:06:00.000+08:00

Some people call me Ja-NERD, some call me Ja-NET. And other people just call me other names.

So here's a very nice poem about Ja-nerd from the poet-master-pageant-king-soccer-star-history-lover-heavenly-hunk.

hh... says (4:01 AM):
jarrod and janet
sharing a carrot
he looks like a parrot
but at least he aint a faggot

hh... says (4:03 AM):
if i tink of a NET version i'll tell u